Princess Castles

Ava is very destructive. I know everyone thinks that destructiveness is just a little boy thing but I assure you, it is not. Anyhow, she was about to destroy something else the other day (in the car, so I was powerless to stop her) and this is the resulting conversation:

Me: "AVA. STOP IT RIGHT NOW. If you break that, I will take money out of your piggy bank to pay for it!"

Ava: (wailing) "Noooooo! Mommy you can't take my piggy bank! I'm saving my money for a princess castle!"

Me: "Oh, for your dolls?"

Ava: "No, for me! I need to buy a princess castle to live in!"

Me: "You are going to use your piggy bank money to buy an actual castle....?"

Ava: "YES!"

Me: "Who's going to live there with you?"

Ava: "YOU ARE!"

Me: "Oh. Thanks. So I guess you better stop destroying things so you can get your castle, huh?"

Ava: "Okay! I'm sorry!"

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Ava was watching the cartoon "Oswald" on Nick Jr. It's about an octopus that lives in a city, not underwater, and the characters totally give me the creeps. Anyhow...

Ava: (whispering to herself, sounding both fascinated and disturbed) "Oswald...doesn't have a nose????"

Apparently, he does not. But she fixated on this and seemed pretty worried. You really had to be there I guess...

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Ava: (Licks my leg for no apparent reason)

Me: "Ava, that is DISGUSTING. DO NOT LICK ME!"

Ava: "Well, it wasn't me! My tongue just wanted to lick something!"

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Ava: (Out of her seat at the dinner table for about the fifth time)

Me: "Go back to your seat right now, young lady, or you are going to get popped on your butt!"

Ava: (Goes back to her seat) "Mommy! Can you move that chair? I can't see the TV!" (yeah, we don't normally watch TV during dinner but I was feeling a little lazy today)

Me: "Ava, you are a big girl, you can move it yourself."

Ava: "No, I can't. You told me to stay in my seat."

Me: "You are right. I did. Thank you, I'll go ahead and move that chair for you..."

Ava +1, Mommy +0

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Ava: "I'm sick, I have a fever!"

Me: "No, you do not."

Ava: "Yes I do! And it's ALL YOUR FAULT! You talk at me too much and it gave me a FEVER!"

Me: "..."

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Craig: (in the daily video he sent to Ava this evening) "Go Eagles!"

Me: (speaking to the video) "No, GO BEARS!"

Ava: (with a very ornery look on her face) "GO EAGLES!"

Me: "Oh, Ava...you are not my child."

Ava: "And you are not my mother!"


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Translating Ava-Speak:

1. "gonuts" = donuts

2. "hotted chips with cheese" =  nachos (she refers to heating things up or setting them on fire as "hotting" them)

3. "ambleeance" = ambulance

4. "ridicleeus" = ridiculous